Thelma and Louise (actually, Suzanne and Joanna) hit the road...
After 738 miles and over twelve hours of driving, I have finally made it home! My mom was sweet enough to fly out to Detroit from Chicago so that she could make the trip with me. All in all, it was pretty uneventful, although it started out as a real pain in the ass. My mother ordered our TripTix through AAA, but when I started flipping through the book on Thursday night, I realized we had a problem.
Me: "Um, Mom, where are the directions?"
Mom: "What?"
The woman at AAA printed out our book without the turn by turn directions, which is the only thing we wanted in the first place. Normally this is no big deal, as you can print them yourself at home using the AAA website. Only my Comcast guy had just left the house 15 minutes earlier, after disconnecting my internet and cable. Sweet. So we hopped in the car and drove to the library, where the internet was down. Actually the whole network was down, so none of the other ibraries had internet access either. Luckily, a nice old woman sent us to West Bloomfield, where they had access, so we got our directions without further issues, even if it took us over an hour. Back at home, I checked our maps, and noticed how close we would be going by Niagra Falls.
Me: "Too bad we won't have time to stop at Niagra Falls. We're going right
through there."
Mom: "Niagra Falls? Are we going that far north? Are we going into Canada?
Because I don't have my passport."
Me: "Shit."
Now, you can get into Canada without a passport, but you can't get back into the USA without it, or at least a birth certificate and driver's license. This fact made our directions useless, cause there was no way I was leaving my mother stranded north of the border. So we packed the car, I sent my mom to bed, and I went out drinking.
Sidenote: Thanks to those of you who came out to 5th Avenue for my Bon Voyage Party. I'll miss you guys! And the Killer Flamingos ROCK!
In the morning, after 5 hours of sleep, we had to go to another AAA for new TripTix. The lovely woman behind the desk rerouted us, so we got on the road by 10, and had arrived at the hotel in Syracuse by 7. Up at 8 and back in Connecticut by 2:30. Not much excitement there! We sang along with Stevie Nicks, ate cheeseburgers, and that was about it. No shooting dirtbags, no picking up cowboys, no driving off of cliffs. Pretty pathetic by Hollywood standards, but this is my mom we're talkng about.
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