Medium Raw

Remember back in November when E and I went to see Anthony Bourdain? Where I sat high up in the balcony laughing like a hyena with a bunch of really confused Germans?  Where I then tried to hunt him down in all the foodie spots of Ann Arbor with zero success except drunkeness? Well, his new book has just been released, so lucky me, I got to go meet him fo' realz' this time at a book signing. Our little bookstore is known for getting everyone who's good to show up and read, so I've got the schedule devoted to memory. This month they also have Pat Benatar and Bernadette Peters, so it's like a whole month of badass celebs I want to be. 

It was nice to see Tony (cause you know, we're totally BFF's and I can call him that) in a smaller setting where I could actually tell how ginormously tall this dude is. I mean, freakishly tall. He read a few sections from his new book  Medium Raw, which is honest and hilarious, even better than Kitchen Confidential. He then took tons of questions, of which I asked the first, trying desperately not to choke on my saliva or turn 8 shades of red. I think I succeeded in not sounding like too much of a tool. There were a lot of tools in the room. Including the guy who overheard a cute young girl, planning what she was going to say to Tony. He then stole her line, got a big laugh, and smirked at her like a big fat dbag. I was tempted to punch him in the face, but I'm not violent and I didn't want to get kicked out before my books got signed. 

I watched a ton of people get scary close to take pictures, which made me shiver. I'm all about personal space. When it was finally my turn, I called bullshit on T.B. for an anti-Red Sox comment he had made earlier. See, there's this video of Tony and Alice Cooper, waxing poetic about how they loved watching the Sox win the World Series and stating that Sox fans are amazing. He smiled and told me how much he respects the team and Boston fans, how he's shooting a Boston episode of No Reservations, and he started suggesting books to me. But then. Then some crazy half drunk chick fell down the stairs, ass over tea kettle! Kinda ruined our moment. But at least I had the wherewithal to look over when the camera guy took a photo. I present you with the most awkward picture I have taken since 7th grade, complete with bad florescent lighting, not enough makeup, and what appears to be some business woman's blazer. Hawt.